prof: (Default)
Quinn ([personal profile] prof) wrote2011-11-28 05:24 pm

Let's Play Hivebent


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Act 5 Act 1: MOB1US DOUBL3 R34CH4ROUND


Part 6: Scratch



Link back to comic: Page 2253

[ BGM - Scratch ]




Doc Scratch
????
Interests: ????
Likes: ????
Dislikes: ????
Fetch Modus: ????




Doc Scratch is the First Guardian of Alternia. Every planet destined for sentient life has a First Guardian, a nigh-omnipotent being who exists to guide that planet towards its ultimate purpose in paradox space.

At present, he is playing a complex game with a manipulative troll girl from the planet below. She has been getting closer to actually beating him recently, and he has no idea how this is possible.

Uncertainty is troublesome for an omniscient being.




GC: H3Y WH1T3 T3XT GUY
GC: 1 H4V3 4 T1P FOR YOU

How were you able to contact me?
Never mind, I figured it out instantly.
You asked your clever friend with the colorful spectacles to trace the source of my messages.
He then established a relay for your messages to reach this source through some sort of computational proxy.
I gather he has recovered from his implementation as a weapon in the sabotage of your mutual friend, whom you both believe to be dead.

GC: OH MY GOD WH1T3 T3XT GUY!
GC: SHUT UP! >:O

I have a name.
I'm not going to tell you my name.
But if you wish, you may refer to me as Mr. Vanilla Milkshake.
It is perfectly in keeping with a habit which you will develop in the future.

GC: SOUNDS K1ND OF S1LLY 4ND FR1VOLOUS
GC: BL4R WHY DO YOU K33P D3R41L1NG M3!
GC: W41T
GC: YOU S41D W3 B3L13V3 OUR FR13ND 1S D34D
GC: 1S SH3 NOT?

Yes, I said you believe she is dead.
And soon, you will believe she is not.
Both statements are true.

GC: NO WOND3R SH3 SN4PP3D SH3S GOT TO D34L W1TH YOUR STUP1D R1DDL3S 4LL TH3 T1M3
GC: 4NYW4Y C4N YOU JUST H3LP M3 G3T R3V3NG3 SO W3 C4N C4LL 1T 4 N1GHT

Why would I involve myself in your paltry feud beyond the extent I already have?

GC: H4V3NT YOU WOND3R3D HOW SH3 C4N COM3 CLOS3 TO B34T1NG YOU 1N G4M3S L4T3LY
GC: HON3STLY 1M SURPR1S3D YOU H4V3NT D3DUC3D 1T Y3T

What do you know of this?

GC: SH3S CH34T1NG
GC: SH3 4LW4YS CH34TS 1F SH3 C4N F1ND 4 W4Y
GC: L4T3LY SH3S US3D TH3 S4M3 4DV4NT4G3 SH3 US3S 4G41NST M3 WH3N W3 PL4Y G4M3S

What advantage is this?

GC: HOLD ON





GC: H3Y VR1SK4
GC: 4NYTH1NG TO S4Y
GC: 4BOUT K1LL1NG H3R
GC: 4FT3R YOU S41D YOU WOULDNT

AG: Oh, that? I thought we were done talking a8out it!
AG: We concluded I messed up and I'm completely horri8le in every way.
AG: I can only feel SO AWFUL, you know. Here, I'm 8anging my head against the desk now.
AG: Uuuuuuuugh, what do you want from me????????

GC: 1 GU3SS 1M LOOK1NG FOR SOM3 R34SON TO CH4NG3 MY M1ND
GC: 1 DONT KNOW WH4T YOU C4N S4Y TH4TLL DO 1T

AG: You should lighten up a 8it. May8e even congratul8 me!
AG: Wow, great jo8 Vriska! Single handedly taking out Team Charge like that.
AG: What are you going to do, Pyrope!

GC: YOULL B3 D34D 1N 4 COUPL3 M1NUT3S

AG: Yeah right!!!!!!!!
AG: Complete and total muscle8east shit!

GC: 1F YOU DONT B3L13V3 M3
GC: WHY DONT YOU CONSULT W1TH YOUR L1TTL3 4DV4NT4G3
GC: 1T S33MS TO H4V3 4LL TH3 4NSW3RS




There's no way Terezi could have some way of killing you from out there. But still, it doesn't hurt to check.

Your Magic Cueball, unlike your Magic 8 Balls, is 100% accurate with its every prediction. For most people, the fact that it has no window would be a problem, but you can see through it with your Vision Eightfold.

The question is: Does Terezi have a way at getting back at you?



At which point, Terezi told Mr. Vanilla Milkshake about his missing orb.








And that's how Vriska lost her arm and her eye.






In the present, her luck isn't faring much better.

She is currently putting her lusus out of its misery.



The mercy killing triggers another avalanche. Your luck fucking sucks!



Moments before Equius's house can crush you, though, Aradia finishes guiding him into the Medium, taking the house with him. You are saved.



arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA]


AG: Did you just zap Equius into the game? His hive disappeared!

AA: are y0u n0t happy ab0ut that
AA: y0u were ab0ut t0 be killed by his hive
AA: pr0ceeding with that plan w0uldnt have made sense

AG: 8ut!
AG: Aaaaaaaah!
AG: You knew this was going to happen! You were planning it all along! You're planning all this. I know a schemer when I see one!

AA: it had t0 g0 this way

AG: No! It had to go the way we said it would. I was going to give you the present I convinced him to m8ke for you. Me! It wo8ldn't have got m8de if not f8r me!
AG: And then you could have a 8ody again and everyth8ng would 8e fine. Then we could go 8ack to 8eing friends again.

AA: were we ever really friends

AG: I don't know. I felt like we were even if you didn't think so.

AA: i d0nt remember
AA: it d0esnt matter

AG: 8arf. More of this apathetic 8aloney. Why don't you cut the ghost girl act already? I get it! You're dead and spooky.

AA: ribbit

AG: Uh, okay?

AA: s0rry

AG: That's cool, you can ri88it if you want. In a weird way it almost makes you sound normal!
AG: I guess I follow you into the game instead? Fine 8y me! I'll follow you guys. Just give me my orders, 8oss.

AA: y0ure n0t 0n the blue team
AA: y0u were never g0ing t0 be

AG: I get it. I finally see now. This is your revenge.
AG: You finally did it, Megido. You got me pretty good. Well played.

AA: y0u were always supp0sed t0 be 0n the red team
AA: ive never th0ught ab0ut revenge at all

AG: 8ut why not!
AG: I killed you!!!!!!!!

AA: i d0nt care

AG: AAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!
AG: You're so infuri8ing! Why c8n't you just h8 me? It would 8e a lot easier th8t way.
AG: Or at least feel 8othered or annoyed or S8METHING! God!!!!!!!!
AG: May8e I sh8uld just rip my he8rt out of my chest and pound it to a 8loody pulp here on my desk with my sup8r strong ro8ot arm.
AG: Pound pound pound pound pound pound pound pound!
AG: 8ecause clearly it's up to me to feel em8tions for the 8oth of us, you misera8le soulless witch!
AG: I h88888888 you!
AG: H8 h8 h8 h8 h8 h8 h8 haaaaaaaate!
AG: I only regret killing you cause it m8de you so 8ORING!!!!!!!!

AA: s0rry
AA: they need y0u th0ugh
AA: and its where y0u need t0 be
AA: karkat will be in t0uch with y0u s00n

AG: Oh god, I can't w8 for THAT convers8tion.

AA: als0 if its any c0ns0lati0n
AA: the teams are meaningless anyway

AG: What? Why would that 8e consol8tion? It's more vague spooky nonsense!
AG: Fuck you for me trying to help you.
AG: Fuck the 8lue team, fuck your conniving, fuck Equius's dou8ledealing and the stupid muscle8east he rode in on, and fuck you for s8ving my life.
AG: FUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!


arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling apocalypseArisen [AA]







CT: D --> Aradia, here's the deal
CT: D --> Now that the game has begun, the plan will be modified slightly
CT: D --> We will not be co-leaders of the b100 team
CT: D --> I alone will be the leader

AA: im 0k with it

CT: D --> Do you typically embrace such a passive attitude when your superiors give you orders

AA: i d0nt usually receive 0rders fr0m superi0rs 0r 0therwise
AA: but really its fine

CT: D --> I think I should get a towel
CT: D --> I'm perspiring heavily again

AA: whats wr0ng

CT: D --> Forget it
CT: D --> It's just pleasant to consort with one of lesser breeding who clearly understands her place
CT: D --> I 100k forward to seeing how well you serve me, server player

AA: thats n0t quite the meaning 0f the w0rd server
AA: as y0ur server i manipulate y0ur envir0nment t0 help y0u advance

CT: D --> Are you
CT: D --> Are you saying
CT: D --> That
CT: D --> You are in a position of control over me

AA: i supp0se s0

CT: D --> Oh my God
CT: D --> This is
CT: D --> Impropriety of a caliber I cannot even
CT: D --> To consider that someone so low could be in a position of authority over me is
CT: D --> It's just so
CT: D --> I need some air
CT: D --> Or some cold milk
CT: D --> Or a towel, I need a towel

AA: 0_0
AA: are y0u sure y0ure alright

CT: D --> You could cause quite a bother for me, with the power you wield
CT: D --> I can do nothing to stop you, peasant girl
CT: D --> It's so magnificently depraved

AA: y0u are s0 weird
AA: and this is c0ming fr0m a gh0st
AA: ribbit

CT: D --> I command you to have free will and do as you please
CT: D --> And continue being bothersome and unpredictably destructive
CT: D --> I mean
CT: D --> If you want
CT: D --> I will make haste through this mysterious realm and find your gate
CT: D --> I will then give you your new body, and you may take your rightful place as my subordinate

AA: everything y0u say s0unds strange

CT: D --> Actually
CT: D --> Now I'm beginning to wonder
CT: D --> Maybe I would like you to be the co-leader again
CT: D --> Oh my goodness, I can't believe I'm entertaining this thought
CT: D --> Would you mind terribly
CT: D --> Being the leader

AA: fine

CT: D --> Yes, that's the spirit
CT: D --> You take to authority well for one of your b100d

AA: i d0nt have bl00d

CT: D --> Not yet
CT: D --> But soon your heart will beat anew, and through it, fresh b100d and fresh passion

AA: w0w uh
AA: can y0u just bring me the r0b0t already




Navigating the gates is child's play for someone as STRONG as you.



ARADIASPRITE: it l00ks nice
EQUIUS: D --> It is perfect in every way
EQUIUS: D --> Do you
EQUIUS: D --> Have a clean towel anywhere
ARADIASPRITE: ribbit




EQUIUS: D --> How does it feel
ARADIABOT: it feels
ARADIABOT: different!
EQUIUS: D --> Ok
EQUIUS: D --> But I mean
EQUIUS: D --> Do you feel anything else
EQUIUS: D --> Such as
EQUIUS: D --> Sensations which may be stirred by flowing b100d and a beating heart
ARADIABOT: im n0t sure
EQUIUS: D --> Can you detect anything within you might describe as
EQUIUS: D --> Smoldering passion
ARADIABOT: wait
ARADIABOT: what is that
ARADIABOT: this feeling
ARADIABOT: 0h g0d
ARADIABOT: 0H MY G0D WHAT DID Y0U D0!



ARADIABOT: did y0u pr0gram this r0b0t t0 have feelings f0r y0u?
ARADIABOT: R0MANTIC FEELINGS???
EQUIUS: D --> Hrrrk
EQUIUS: D --> Yes
EQUIUS: D --> It's a chip in your heart
ARADIABOT: get it 0ut
EQUIUS: D --> I guess I can
EQUIUS: D --> Uninstall it if you would just
ARADIABOT: GET IT 0UT!!!
ARADIABOT: GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT GET IT 0UT












NEXT CHAPTER: A familiar face!


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[identity profile] ana0119.livejournal.com 2011-11-30 06:42 am (UTC)(link)
The ghost robot girl going batshit was cool.

But now they're sucking face?!?! Oh, god, what, I don't even

(T-that's one hell of a chip, to survive all that...)

[identity profile] professor-prof.livejournal.com 2011-11-30 06:44 am (UTC)(link)
The real answer is that troll relationships are very strange and complicated things, as we will find out in tomorrow's entry!

[identity profile] ana0119.livejournal.com 2011-11-30 06:46 am (UTC)(link)
They certainly have some interesting kinks. The depravity~