prof | Let's Play Umineko, Episode 4 Tea Party: The Last Mystery

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The blue wedge keeping Beato in place shatters. All her wounds vanish.

The ruler of Rokkenjima stands with dignity once more.

BGM: Endless Nine

If you are worthless, then I shall decide this match right here, right now. With my grand victory, I will make you regret the fact that you didn't compromise for all eternity! Come, starting from the first game!

Right! From the first twilight of the first game! There is nothing strange about the murder of the six relatives that were found in the gardening shed in the beginning! The crime was possible for any of those who didn't have an alibi!

Effective. Continue, what about the next closed room murder, with Eva and Hideyoshi?! Even the chain was set for that closed room! I shall add to the red truth. Both were killed by another person! It is not the case that, after the construction of the closed room, one of them committed suicide after committing murder! Furthermore, the murder was carried out with both the victim and the perpetrator in the same room! No method exists for the perpetrator to commit murder from outside the room!

Suppose that the culprit was a human without an alibi. In other words, the dead! Among the first six corpses, there were some made unidentifiable because their faces were smashed. One possible theory is that one was actually a fake corpse, and that the culprit X killed those two after pretending to be a victim and hiding away! Then, after the closed room murder was constructed, the culprit hid under the bed, and waited for all of us to leave!

Very well, next! Kanon was killed in the boiler room, correct? I shall add to the red truth. All of the survivors have alibis! Let us include the dead as well! In short, no kind of human or dead person on the island could have killed Kanon!

If no one could kill him, then he might have been the one to kill! Meaning Kanon might have killed himself.

One more. Repeat it, 'Kanon's death was a homicide!'

I refuse to repeat it.

By that refusal, it may be possible to view it as a homicide, but you've already proclaimed that no one could have killed him. In other words, it wasn't a homicide. This is the same as the linked closed rooms from the third game. Kanon died for a reason that was neither suicide nor homicide. The details are unknown, but he died from an accident. Due to the Devil's Proof, I refuse to explain what kind of blunder could have led to an accidental death where a stake was driven into his chest!

Hohoh, now that you have borrowed the power of the devil, you are without peer! It is effective! In that case, what about the murders after that in the parlor, of Genji, Nanjo, and Kumasawa? Naturally, Maria, who was in the same room, did not kill them! And of course, the three deaths were all due to homicide!

We can explain the one who performed the murder with culprit X, who hid away using an unidentified corpse. In the first place, their free faces were also smashed. It's completely possible that one of them was a body-double corpse!

Regarding unidentified corpses, all of their identities are guaranteed. Therefore, no body double tricks exist!

Then you can explain it with simultaneous murders. Each of them had a gun, pointed it clockwise, and blew each other's faces off at the same time! After that, Maria collected those guns and hid them! How about that?!

Wh-What a ridiculous argument! I... I like it! Then what about Natsuhi in the end?! I shall add to the red truth! Natsuhi was killed by another person! There are no unidentified corpses, and all of the survivors have alibis!

You can explain it with an indirect murder due to trap X! Something was done to Natsuhi's gun. You can explain it if that was a trap gun, built to send a bullet right into the forehead of anyone who tried to hold it up and shoot it!

The bullet buried into Natsuhi's forehead was not fired from Natsuhi's gun!

There is the possibility that Natsuhi was lured out by that letter of unknown contents, and she was called out into the hall. Then, she was forced into standing at a specified location at a specified time and murdered by trap X, whch used a gun that had been installed beforehand!

One again, the stakes of the blue truth pierce Beato's chest.

By advancing to the next board, she is able to remove them, but the wounds persist. This isn't over yet!

Damn iiiiit! No compassion, no mercy! Here goes the second game! I'll start with the first crime! At the time, I had already seen through the closed room where the six were killed in the chapel. Someone secretly borrowed Maria's key, and secretly returned it to Maria's bag after the crime was over!

From the time Maria received her key to the instant Rosa unsealed the envelope the next day, the key passed through no one's hands!

There is the possibility that the door had an auto-lock just like gramps's study. In other words, it was unlocked before the crime, with a rock or something wedged in so that it couldn't close completely. Then they gave the key to Maria. Because the lock was automatic, it is possible to make a theory where the key wasn't needed!

No door with an auto-lock exists other than Kinzo's study!

The victims locked the door from the inside. One of the six was the culprit, and this person killed the other five, then pretended to be dead!

The six people were already dead by the time they were discovered! All were killed by other people! All six were genuine victims, and did not take part in a mutual murder! There was no simultaneous murder!

A human, perhaps Kumasawa, existed with no alibi at the time. If we assume that someone was hiding on the inside, then there are no problems!

There was no one hiding in the chapel. By this, a shut-in murder like you say does not work! What's wrong, Ushiromiya Battleer, is that all?! It's not so easy once you get to the second game, riiiight?!

As the blue and red swords clash, Beatrice's breathing runs ragged. She's on her last legs - victory is within reach!

Buh, hahahahahahahahaahahahaha! What the hell's thaaaaaaaaaat?! Small booooombs?! Waaahahahahahahahaahahahaha!

Ha, laugh as much as you want! Got a problem with that?!

None! That reckless argument is just pleasant! Next is the closed room with Jessica and Kanon!

No problems there! If the culprit was one of the servants, they could have used a master key. It's not even a closed room!

After that, there was an attack in the servant room from a mystery person who seemed to be Kanon, and Nanjo and Kumasawa were killed, right?! I had already proclaimed Kanon's death in red before that time. Then, who was that Kanon?!

If Kanon's death was proclaimed in red, there's no way he was alive. Therefore, there is a chance that the one who attacted that group was in a disguise to make the group mistake them for Kanon!

They definitely would not mistake any different person for Kanon!

Then, just like the heredity of Kinzo's name, there is a possibility that Kanon's name was inherited by someone. You could suppose that Kanon was killed, a different person succeeded that name, and that this person attacked them!

Hyahaaaaah! Once again, you've set up some human as the culprit as if it were nothing! You truly are gabbing on about things you would never be able to open your mouth and say on the game board! But it is effective! That reckless argument is pleasant! Just pleasant. This isn't pain, it's pleasant!

No, I don't. Fighting over such trivial matters is boring! I'll give it to you, I'll give you this second game!

Does it hurt?

Huuurt? No, no, this just tickles. Uhyahyahyahyahyaaaaaaaahh! Compared to having your entire body torn to bits and turned into a pile of scrap meat, like your sister, riiiiight?! I'll make you scrap meat too, then the siblings can be all mixed together like ground beef and pork!

Aaaarrrrgggggh! I'll beat you to death, I'll tear you to bits the same way! Next! The third game! How long are you going to sit around?! There is where I'll knock you down to hell!

Whooaaagh! Naturally, how could I sit around due to the likes of this?! Yes, there's still much more! Come, let us begin the third game, starting with the first linked closed rooms! By all rights, you should have penetrated this closed room at the time. But then you killed off Kinzo!

Undone by his own scheme. However!

All five master keys were discovered, each in the pocket of one of the servants! The individual keys were found inside envelopes alongside the corpses! In short, all keys related to the linked closed rooms were locked inside the linked closed rooms! The keys cannot be returned from outside the room using the crack of the door, the crack of the window, vents or any place of the sort!

They they were killed with poison gas! Even if a key couldn't pass through, gas could, right?! The murder was carried out from outside the closed room!

All of them had wounds resembling gunshot wounds, which became fatal! It is impossible for the murder to have taken place from outside the room! I shall say more with the red! When the five other than Kinzo were murdered, the murderer was definitely in the same room! I already proclaimed in red at the time that there were no suicides!

After the murder of each person in their respective rooms, the culprit created a linked closed room. But the culprit just couldn't return the key for the last room to the inside of that closed room no matter what they did. However, they were able to return it. The first person to discover a corpse just had to pretend to find the key and show that they'd pulled it from the pocket of one of the corpses!

Gi, gyaaaaah! Fuuhahahahahahahhahahaahaaaaaaahhh! How could a man who promised to bring Ange her parents home speak of a theory where those parents are the culprit? Just fine, even so, it's just fine, riiiiiight? You can be a big happy family getting their hands dirty with mass murder, and return to Ange stained with blood that will never come ooooooooff! Isn't that perfectly fitting for the survivors of the witch's islaaaaaaaand? Just like that mincemeat Angeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehyahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!

Aaaaaaaarrrrggghhh, shut uuuuuuuuup! I'll kill you! I'll tear you apart! No need to beg for your life, I'll definitely give you the worst kind of death by my own hands!

Yes, you probably could do it! I, who have explored the depths of cruelty over a thousand years, will probably be given a fitting end for that! Ooh, does that hurt? Is it harsh, or does it just tickle? Is that supposed to torment me? Come on, Ushiromiya Battleeeeeeeeeeer, there are still mysteries leeeeeeeeeeeeft!

Every blow that doesn't kill Beatrice delays Battler's return to Ange. No time for mercy. Dedicate everything to killing the witch!

Oho, have I already been cornered so far... I'm in a precarious state, aren't I... ihihihihihihi...

Which means that the mystery of Doctor Nanjo's murder is the last line of defense for you being a witch, right?

As you say. If this is broken, it will mean that all of my mysteries have been broken. Unless I counter one of your truths with some new red truth, or present some new mystery... I will die.

...You don't look like someone who's been pushed into a corner and is standing on the brink. You still have some kind of hidden pitch up your sleeve, right?

Who knows? I have already tired of a life too long after a thousand years! I've started to think that having this life ended by a rival like you, who I met at the very end, might not be so bad.

Well, can you do it? Do it. I beg you, kill meeeee! I'm always the one killing, and I've never had the experience of being kiiiiiiilled! I have killed the 18 of you hundreds of times, but I haven't been killed myself even once, so I wanted to experience it just once myseeeeeeelf, waaeeeeeeeeehhhh!

It is possible for enemies to understand one another, but it is also possible for pure evil to exist. Just by continuing to exist, it is evil. Against such a foe, compassion is unnecessary.

Well, of course. All of you are just pieces in the game! It's just unbelievably fun to think about which six to kill in the beginning, how to kill the next two, and whether I can find a much, much more grotesque way of killing, you seeeeee?

Hey, Battler, I've reformed a little, so forgive me this time, too. And then, I'll change the method of killing to something a little better, you see? I'll listen to how you want them to be killed and in what order, all riiiiiiiight? It's so fun, toying with people's liiiiiives! I'm sure you could think of a way, a way to turn Ange into a pile of scrap meat much more painfully! Come, Battleeeeer! Try to expose the truth of Nanjo's murdeeeeeeeeer!

Everyone remaining has an ironclad alibi in red. Think! How will you overcome this final wall?

How's that, Beatriiiiiiice?!

The battle between Battler and Beatrice is over.

However, the witch is still alive.

BGM: Thanks for Being Born

From atop the forest of blue blades, Beatrice asks for Battler to end her pain.

In the past, Beatrice's tears were once a trick. This time, though, Battler believes them. Tears and blood mix together to form the tears of the red truth.

...It's not so I can go back. In order to stop your pain, I'll listen to your desire.

Thank... you... Battler...

Beatrice raises both hands towards the heavens. One of them falls.

Her body dies, but another Beatrice appears. A faint, ghostly form, face to face with Battler.